Tough love?

Jesus got up, rebuked the wind and said to the waves, “Quiet, be still!” Then the wind died down and it was completely calm. He said to his disciples, “Why are you so afraid? Do you still have no faith?” Mark 4:39-40

The story of Jesus stilling the storm is one of the best-known in the Bible.

He’s with his disciples on the Sea of Galilee, fast asleep “on a cushion”, when a “furious squall” blows up. The disciples panic and wake him up, whereupon he stands and majestically tells the raging elements to quieten down. Which they do. He then turns to the disciples and gives them a bit of a telling off for their lack of faith.

We love the story because it pulls together two of the greatest truths about Jesus – that he was both fully human (tired and in need of rest) and also fully divine (empowered to command the very forces of nature). So simple – and so awe-inspiring!

But focussing on these great truths can blind us to other important truths – in particular, the way Jesus treated his disciples. People sometimes speak of “tough love” – being hard on someone in order to help them learn and grow – and I think that perhaps that phrase fits Jesus’ behaviour here.

Two things strike me.

First, it was he who led them into danger.

Verse 35 tells us: “he said to his disciples, ‘Let us go over to the other side.’” It seems that making this journey was his idea, not theirs; left up to them, they would have stayed safe and sound on shore that night.

Was he deliberately testing them? Could he foresee what was going to happen – that there would be a dangerous storm? I am inclined to answer “No” to both those questions; he was just keen to continue his ministry further afield.

But even if I’m right, that doesn’t alter the fact that it was he who initiated this trip.

Some Christians seem to teach that the reason Jesus lived, died and rose again was basically in order to give those who believe in him a comfortable, smooth, easy life. Perhaps quoting John 10:10 – “I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full” – they teach that, if only you have enough faith, you can expect good health, ample money and a trouble-free family and work situation. This, of course, is the poison of the “prosperity gospel”; but I suspect that in a less extreme form it comes across in many a sermon and lurks in many a Christian’s mind.

But no. Following Jesus is certainly the most wonderful thing we can ever decide to do. But let’s not fool ourselves; it can also be draining, demanding – and seriously painful. Jesus plainly told his disciples, “In this world you will have trouble” (John 16:33). Just ask any of the thousands of those who are persecuted for his sake.

Bad things happen to us simply because we, though Christians, are still part of this fallen world: faith in Jesus is not some kind of insurance policy which gives us an immunity against the ordinary pains and sorrows of life. But what matters is this: God takes these events and experiences as an opportunity to teach us and to help us to grow and mature. Romans 8:28 sums it up perfectly…

Th second thing that strikes me is that Jesus seems to have been quite hard on the disciples once the danger was over.

“Why are you so afraid? Do you still have no faith?” That sounds to me pretty much like a scold, though no doubt a loving one.

I can’t help but put myself in the shoes of the disciples. If I had been in that boat I’m pretty sure I too would have woken Jesus up and cried out for rescue. What, after all, did he expect them to do! Calm the storm themselves? But there’s no reason to think they had ever been given such powers.

Could it be that in effect he was saying: “Look, several of you are professional fishermen! You have been sailing this lake all your lives. You know perfectly well that storms like this are a regular occurrence, and you have battled them on many occasions. So why not today? Why this panic?”

I don’t know. But the fact is that Jesus is disappointed in them. He expects better of them. Of course, when he knows their need he responds to it. But that isn’t what he would have wanted.

Jesus is always there for us, through thick and thin. But are there times we too disappoint him by failing to roll up our sleeves and take responsibility for our own situation? – like a big child who goes running to mummy at the least provocation.

Yes, Jesus is our loving Lord. But he can also be severe with us (remember how he turned on Simon Peter with “Get behind me, Satan”?).

Call it “tough love” if you like. Call it “being cruel to be kind”. But whatever you call it, it’s something we need to look right in the face. Otherwise how will we grow in him?

Lord Jesus, forgive me for those times when I disappoint you. Give me, please, a robust, practical, down to earth faith that will hold me fast in the many storms of life. Amen.