Gratitude

Pharaoh restored the chief cup-bearer to his position, so that he once again put the cup into Pharaoh’s hand… The chief cup-bearer, however, did not remember Joseph; he forgot him. Genesis 40:21-23

Now on his way to Jerusalem, Jesus travelled along the border between Samaria and Galilee. As he was going into a village, ten men who had leprosy met him. They stood at a distance and called out in a loud voice, “Jesus, Master, have pity on us!” When he saw them, he said, “Go, show yourselves to the priests.” And as they went, they were cleansed. One of them, when he saw he was healed, came back, praising God in a loud voice. He threw himself at Jesus’ feet and thanked him - and he was a Samaritan. Jesus asked, “Were not all ten cleansed? Where are the other nine? Has no one returned to give praise to God except this foreigner?” Then he said to him, “Rise and go; your faith has made you well.” Luke 17:11-17

What do you say when somebody thanks you for some little help you’ve given them? Probably, “No, please don’t mention it! It was my pleasure!” or something like. And you mean it quite sincerely – you did whatever it was you did because it was a good thing to do, not out of any wish for thanks. Quite right too.

And yet… it’s good to be thanked, isn’t it? It encourages you, and gives you a little glow of pleasure. If the person doesn’t thank you, you say to yourself, “No problem! – that isn’t why I did it”. And you’d gladly do it again. Yet… something is missing.

A simple question today: How good am I at expressing gratitude?

The chief butler of Pharaoh, the Egyptian king, gets to know Joseph the Israelite in prison (Genesis 40). There he learns that Joseph has a God-given ability to interpret dreams, information which he is able to tell Pharaoh about on his release - and information which Pharaoh badly needs; but information which he fails to pass on.

Not unnaturally Joseph had felt entitled to ask him to keep him in mind: “… when all goes well with you, remember me and show me kindness; mention me to Pharaoh and get me out of this prison”. But we then read the sad little note: “the chief cup-bearer did not remember Joseph; he forgot him” (verses 14 and 23). So in fact Joseph continues to languish in prison.

Ten men with leprosy – a horrible disease that’s both physically destructive and socially isolating – meet Jesus one day on the road (Luke 17:11-17). They cry out to him for healing, and he answers their prayer. But only one of the ten, a Samaritan, thinks to turn back to offer praise to God and give thanks to Jesus. Jesus expresses his disappointment: “Has no-one returned to give praise to God except this foreigner?”

Two dramatic stories – a far cry, of course, from times when we do something to help somebody out in the course of everyday life. But challenging all the same, for both stories remind us how easy it is to be guilty of ingratitude.

We can make excuses for both Pharaoh’s butler and the men with leprosy: if nothing else, they must have been beside themselves with sheer excitement at the change in their fortunes. The lepers especially - to be instantly cleansed after perhaps many years of misery with this affliction! Just imagine!

Perhaps the butler is most at fault. For one thing, Joseph had explicitly asked him to remember him; and for another, even when he had calmed down and been two years back in his former job, he still didn’t remember that strange man he had met in prison. Sad!

But are we any better? Quite likely we feel gratitude when whatever it is is actually  happening; but what good is gratitude that’s felt if it’s not also expressed? The person who needs the encouragement of our gratitude is denied it.

When we’re on the receiving end of gratitude, it’s amazing what a difference a word of appreciation can make. It brightens our whole day; it makes us feel valued; it make us feel we’re not just cogs in a wheel or names on a list: “I’m a person! They noticed me! I matter to them!” And how easy it is to pass on this good feeling – just a simple word, card or greeting will do it.

True, we need to be careful not to overdo it: laying it on with a trowel defeats the whole object – it can come across as unctuous and insincere. No, a simple, genuine word is all that’s required.

If ever people ought to develop the gift of gratitude it is, surely, Christians. We have received the grace of God, entered into salvation in Christ, and been given a new life full of meaning and hope. Gratitude should be in our very DNA! And this is so even when life is hard – some of the brightest, most positive Christians are those who have suffered most. And people who have the most in life but never think to be grateful are often the most grouchy and mean-spirited.

So… is there anyone in your life or mine currently waiting – no! not waiting; that’s just what they’re not doing! – but entitled to a word of gratitude? Like Pharaoh’s butler, are we guilty of forgetting them?

The poet George Herbert (1593-1633) offered a prayer I think we could all take to heart (certainly me, anyway)…

Thou hast given so much to me… Give me one thing more – a grateful heart. Amen!