In need of encouragement?

Encourage one another daily, as long as it is called Today, so that none of you may be hardened by sin’s deceitfulness. Hebrews 3:13

I need encouragement, don’t you? In fact, after the basic necessities of life – food and drink, work, rest, leisure and so on – I can’t think of anything much I need more.

The Bible has much to say about it. I think it’s rather wonderful that in the early church the apostles gave somebody the nickname “Mr Encouragement” (literally, “son of encouragement”). Joseph Barnabas, whatever his faults and weaknesses might have been, was obviously the kind of person who gave others a lift; as I like to put it, he was a picker-upper rather than a puller-downer (Acts 4:36).

The word most commonly used in the New Testament for “encourage” has a wide range of possible connotations, everything from “comfort”, to “cheer”, to “help”, to “support”, to “exhort”, to “urge”, even, perhaps, to “gee up”. In John’s Gospel Jesus uses it to describe the promised Holy Spirit, where the NIV translates “advocate” (14:16, 14:26, 15:26, 16:27), describing somebody who stands by you and speaks up for you in a court of law.

Whoever wrote the Letter to the Hebrews obviously felt the members of the church he was writing to needed encouragement on a regular basis: “Encourage one another daily, as long as it is called Today...” Don’t put it off! If you sense that somebody needs a bit of a boost, then the time they need it is now, not tomorrow or next week or next year; any of those might be too late.

Encouragement, then, is like sunshine after rain. This doesn’t mean, of course, that there is never a time when something a bit sharper or a bit more challenging is needed. The New Testament also tells us there are times we need to correct, warn or “admonish” one another. This can be hard! – but done in a spirit of love and humility it may be the very type of encouragement somebody needs: an act, indeed, of love.

It’s striking how the writer of Hebrews finishes that verse (3:13): we are to “encourage one another daily… so that none of you may be hardened by sin’s deceitfulness”. He is obviously very concerned: to be “hardened by sin’s deceitfulness” is no joke – but why does he speak in such serious terms?

The answer is that a Christian who is losing their way just a little – going off the rails, as we sometimes put it – is likely only to carry on on that track if somebody doesn’t “do a Barnabas” for them. Sin and error can be massively deceptive: what at first seems harmless and innocent enough can gradually become ingrained as an ever-growing bad habit. It is the action of a loving Christian brother or sister to take a deep breath and – well, say what needs to be said. (And we must always remember, of course, that no-one is immune to the danger. As Paul puts it in Galatians 6:1: “if someone is caught in a sin, you who live by the Spirit should restore that person gently. But watch yourselves, or you also may be tempted”.)

I knew somebody once who was asked to leave the church she belonged to; to say she wasn’t happy would be a major understatement. But some years later she told me about it and said, “Looking back now I see it as one of the best things that has ever happened to me”. It had the effect of kick-starting her spiritual life.

Another danger we need to avoid is being so keen to give support that we slip into insincere, shallow encouragement. May God preserve us from both unctuous gushing on the one hand, and what is really a scold with a smile on its face on the other. Most people can spot a false manner or words a mile off anyway (it’s called hypocrisy), and it is no part of Christian love to offer it. Encouragement – yes; flattery  - NO!

One of the greatest things about encouragement is that any of us can provide it. You don’t need a degree in theology or counselling, you don’t need your grasp of doctrine all polished and correct – a kind word or phone call or message, perhaps just a smile, may be enough. I remember somebody once who got really excited because a relative stranger had “remembered my name!”

A fact: tiny things like this can change someone’s day, perhaps even their life. Somebody was lamenting, “I just don’t know what to say to our new neighbours – they don’t really speak English!” and was given the wise advice: “Have you tried ‘Hello’?” That may be all that encouragement means in such a situation.

I started by saying that I need encouragement. Some people who know me may be surprised by that, but I suspect it’s true of even the most self-confident-seeming people: oh yes, we try to project an image of confidence and competence, but stick a tiny pin in our egos and we putter out like a deflated balloon.

Encouragement is, in essence, a part of love. And love is the greatest thing of all, without which we all wither and die. Lord, help me to remember that next time I feel inclined to criticise, correct or find fault!

Forgive me, Father, for the times I dent somebody else’s confidence through unwise or inappropriate words. Just as I delight to be encouraged myself, so help me to be an encourager of others. Amen.