Tracing the rainbow

Perhaps the reason he [Onesimus] was separated from you [Philemon] for a little while was that you might have him back for good  – no longer as a slave, but better than a slave, as a dear brother. Philemon 15

Philemon of Colosse is angry; one of his slaves has run away, after helping himself to some money.

To be honest, Onesimus was never much use anyway (in spite of his name meaning “Useful”!), but nobody is happy to be treated in this way. Well, if ever he resurfaces – trouble! But why on earth would he? – Roman law allowed that runaway slaves could even be executed, so it would be a pretty stupid thing to do.

Philemon puts Onesimus out of his mind and gets on with life.

But then… Onesimus does resurface.

Amazingly, he comes back voluntarily, well aware of the punishment that might await him. Why would he do such a thing! Well, what Philemon doesn’t know is that he has, tucked away in his pocket, a powerful secret weapon.

As Philemon prepares to give him a blasting, Onesimus says, “Er, master, before you say anything, would you mind just reading a letter I have for you?” “A letter?” says Philemon; “what do you mean?” “Well”, says Onesimus, “it’s from Paul, your friend”.

A letter from Paul! Philemon is stunned…

This is the letter we have in our New Testaments at the end of Paul’s letters, the letter in which Paul explains that he has met Onesimus in prison (probably in Rome), that the runaway slave has become a Christian in that time; and in which (here comes the bombshell) he asks Philemon to welcome him back (!) “no longer as a slave, but better than a slave, as a dear brother…”

Picture, please, Philemon’s face as he reads this letter! Is Paul really asking him to treat one of his slaves as “a dear brother! He realises that he has, as they say, some serious thinking to do. And that’s putting it mildly.

I can’t guarantee this is exactly how this drama unfolded – I’ve used my imagination a bit. But it must have been something like this. Why not read Philemon again yourself (it’s only twenty-five verses) and see how you can bring it to life?

What I want to focus on particularly is verse 15, the one that begins “Perhaps the reason Onesimus was separated from you for a little while was …”

What’s so special about that? Well, I am struck by the way Paul assumes there must have been a reason why these things had happened. It wasn’t just chance. Putting it simply… Something bad had happened; but God was bringing something good out of it. This is a truth which the Bible often illustrates - and a truth we can apply to ourselves amid the ups and downs of our lives today.

Bad things happen to God’s people, jut as to everybody else. Often we are puzzled; we can’t see any rhyme or reason in it. But often also we find later on - and it may be very much later - that something good resulted. To use the words of the old hymn: “God moves in a mysterious way/ His wonders to perform”.

The classic Bible example is Joseph in the Book of Genesis. He suffers the cruelty and injustice of being sold into slavery by his jealous brothers. His master’s wife viciously gets him put in prison. But God does an amazing thing – Joseph becomes the Egyptian king’s right-hand man, and is used to save the world from famine. This wouldn’t have happened if he hadn’t been through his seemingly meaningless suffering.

And when Joseph eventually meets again those cruel brothers, what does he say to them? Does he blast them for their wickedness? No. “Do not be distressed, and do not be angry with yourselves for selling me here, because it was to save lives that God sent me ahead of you (Genesis 45).

Yes, it was anything but obvious at the time. Yes, what happened was wrong, wicked. Yes, it plunged Joseph into years of pain and misery. But, says Joseph, God was behind it all, working out purposes that nobody could have had the remotest idea of.

A simple question: Do you believe that God has reasons for the bad things that happen to you? I was taught as a very young Christian that in the purposes of God there is no such thing as coincidence, and I have never seen any reason to doubt that. As another great hymn puts it, there are times we need to “trace the rainbow through the rain”.

Have faith in God! The sun will shine again, and his wonderful purposes will become clear.

And if for you, as for me at the moment, things are going along fairly smoothly, let’s make a point of praying right now for our brothers and sisters who are presently in the valley of the shadow…

Lord Jesus Christ, there are millions of people in this world today who faithfully seek to trust and obey you, but to whom truly terrible things are happening. Please look specially on them, and touch them with your comfort, grace and light. Amen.

Thinking about anger

A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. Proverbs 15:1

Would you describe yourself as a stirrer-up or as a calmer-down?

I don’t know if it’s just me, but I get the impression that ugly, naked, vicious anger is far more common than it used to be. I was treated the other day to a mouthful of extremely vile language by another driver who obviously felt I hadn’t moved quickly enough for his liking. It wasn’t just the words he used but, perhaps even more, the twisted, hate-filled contortion of his (very red) face that was most alarming. I felt like saying, “You need to watch it, mate! – carry on like that and you’ll be heading for a heart attack”. Just as well, really, that a reply wasn’t possible…

Proverbs 15:1 is one of those verses that says, perfectly, exactly what needs to be said. A dozen words, but, digested and acted on, they have the power to change our lives, and that little bit of the world we live our lives in, for the better.

Anger isn’t always wrong. Jesus displayed anger that day in the Jerusalem Temple when he saw the way the religious authorities had allowed the most sacred place in all of Israel to become corrupted: he even used physical force (Mark 11:15-17).

This suggests that not only are there times we may be angry, but, still more, that there may be times it’s wrong not to be. When we see cruelty and lies, bullying, poverty, hatred, hypocrisy, we ought to be angry; if we’re not there’s something wrong with us.

But what matters is what we do with that anger. Do we let it flare up so that we lose control? – like that man in the other car. Or do we channel it in a positive way?

I don’t have any doubt that when Jesus went to the Temple that day he knew exactly what he was going to do. After all, he had been there many times before, so he knew what went on there. But he knew that the time had now come to make a clear demonstration. And so the anger that had built up inside him came to controlled expression in such a way as to change things for ever.

Of course, we can all be guilty of a flash of temper – “losing our cool”, as we say – and that is simply a sin we must repent of. (And it’s no good saying “Oh, that’s just me – it’s just the way I am”. If the Spirit of God lives in us, then we can, and must, learn to take control and ensure, however long it takes and however hard it is, that it ceases to be the way I am! What’s the point of following Jesus if it doesn’t change us?)

If I’m right in my impression that anger is more common today, it may have something to do with social media. How easy it is to shoot off some insult or volley of expletives without stopping to think. Because, of course, stopping and thinking are what’s needed – otherwise known as conversation.

Suppose that driver and I had had a chance to calmly exchange our views. Instead of…

Him: You ******* *****!!! Why *** **** didn’t you move when you had the chance????

Me (under my breath): You need to watch it, mate! – carry on like that and you’ll be heading for a heart attack…

It could have been…

Him: I say, old chap, don’t you think you were a little slow moving off then?

Me: To be honest, I thought I got it about right. But if I delayed you, I gladly apologise.

Him: Oh well, stuff happens, I suppose.

Me: That’s right – why don’t we go and have a coffee?

And we’re friends for life! And, who knows, he’s the first person to say a word of eulogy at my funeral.

What do you mean, unlikely? Have you no faith? Oh, all right then. But you get the point…

There’s nothing easier than to bawl or yell at someone we’ve taken a dislike to, whether in the flesh or on social media. Even university students are doing that when they “no-platform” some professor whose views they don’t like the sound of. And as for politicians, sports stars and other celebrities who have displeased some group of people – the vitriol they’re on the receiving end of is almost beyond belief.

But how about listening? How about thinking about the other person’s point of view? How about opening ourselves to the possibility that they could have a point?

So… Am I a trouble-maker or a peace-maker? Ready with the “gentle answer that turns away wrath”? Or with the “harsh word that stirs up anger”? Let’s be honest, now…

A footnote: There is of course one particular “gentle answer” which hardly ever fails: I’m sorry. Is there someone I should be saying sorry to today?

Lord Jesus, at all times and in all places help me to remember your word, Blessed are the peace-makers. Amen.

How not to market your church

 Let someone else praise you, and not your own mouth. Proverbs 27:2

When you are invited, take the lowest place, so that when your host comes he will say to you, “Friend, move up to a better place”. Luke 27:10

We were on holiday once when our two boys were little. Looking for a church on the Sunday morning we found one that informed the world, via its notice-board, that it was “your welcoming church!”.

Sounds good! we thought. That’ll do us just nicely. There’s nothing like a friendly welcome when you’re in a strange place, is there?

Well, nobody spoke to us – apart from the person on official “door duty”. Not a soul. Huh! we thought - some welcome!

(I might as well add that as we were driving away we discovered that our older son had a toy car in his hot little fist, presumably purloined from the creche; and that, alas, we felt not a shred of guilt or remorse, nor the remotest desire to swing round and restore it, wicked souls that we are. Oh well, if one day we get done for receiving stolen goods, we’ll just have to accept it…)

Proverbs 27:2 is talking about individuals “blowing their own trumpet”, as we sometimes say. But it applies also to churches, as we discovered. (And not just churches: I once visited a major hospital which had a massive slogan on its outer wall: “Delivering quality health care”. And I thought to myself “Hang on a minute, isn’t that what all hospitals are supposed to do as a matter of course? Is it really a cause for boasting?”)

What my gripe comes down to is one of my pet hate-words: image. The big question in many people’s minds is not “What kind of person am I?” or “Do I always aim to do what is honest, good and right?”, but “How do I appear to others?”, “What do people think of me?”, “Do I make a good impression?” We want to be admired and praised – never mind whether or not we deserve it. And if a bit of boasting helps do the trick, so be it.

Perhaps you’re honestly not like that – in which case, my apologies, and please ignore everything I say. But I have a suspicion you’re fairly rare.

Why is it wrong to draw attention to our own qualities and achievements? There are various reasons.

First, we simply aren’t capable of seeing ourselves as we truly are, so what’s the point of bigging ourselves up? In our folly, we imagine we are better, cleverer, wittier, more attractive than we really are. If only we knew what other people say behind our backs!

Second, it’s a waste of time and effort. We may at first succeed in impressing someone who doesn’t know us very well; but don’t worry, the real you or me will soon begin to show through, like grey hair when the dye is wearing off. Truth will out!

Third, it shows wrong priorities in life. If we’re Christians, what matters is how God sees us, not any fellow human being. That doesn’t mean we should be indifferent to the opinion of others; not at all. But at the end of the day, God knows every last thing about us, so why waste time and energy trying to create a good impression? I heard it said once that there are just two basic, simple rules about what it means to be a Christian: Be like Christ - and be yourself. Yup, I’ll go along with that!

Fourth, if we are Christians our main concern should be to point others to Christ, not to ourselves. I love the words of John the Baptist, when his followers were unhappy about people turning to Jesus rather than to him. Don’t worry! he told them, “He must become greater; I must become less” (or, as the King James Version puts it, “He must increase; I must decrease”).

Fifth, it can be very exhausting to be daily “keeping up appearances”. By the same token, it’s liberating to simply be who we are.

Here are two quotations from nineteenth century evangelists.

First, Englishman C H Spurgeon: “Be not proud of race, face, place or grace”.

And then American Dwight L Moody: “God sends no-one away empty except those who are full of themselves”.

I said “image” was a pet hate-word of mine. So too is the word “marketing” when applied to churches – that church we visited was in essence trying to market itself to the neighbourhood. But what a waste of time! The only marketing a church needs is a cheerful, Christlike holiness among its members. Isn’t that why Jesus called those who were to lead his church “pastors” – shepherds – not managers or CEOs?

Jesus, take me as I am,/ I can come no other way./ Take me deeper into you,/ Make my flesh-life melt away./ Make me like a precious stone,/ Crystal-clear and finely honed,/ Life of Jesus shining through,/ Giving glory back to you. Amen. Dave Bryant

Thinking about marriage

Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as to the Lord… Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church… Ephesians 5:22-25

I suspect I wasn’t the only person, nor the only Christian, to feel sad about the break-up of the marriage of Bill and Melinda Gates.

As far as I am aware, they don’t profess to be Christians; but somehow, in a moral environment where divorce has become almost routine, where, indeed, marriage itself has begun to look seriously outdated, they gave an impression of stability in an increasingly unstable world.

Not Christians, perhaps; but, to use an old-fashioned word, they came across as wholesome, living a solid family life and devoting a lot of time and energy – not to mention money, of course – to worthwhile causes. And then – oh dear! - it all turned out to be hollow and blighted.

The thought that came to my mind was this: If such an event has the effect of causing millions of people to shake their heads in sadness, how much power does a solid, truly durable Christian marriage have in order to be a blessing and encouragement to many people who barely know the couple involved?

I hesitate to write this, because I know that talk of marriage can be very painful – for people who aren’t married but wish they were, or who are married but wish they weren’t, or have been married but are now on their own, for whatever reason. I’m directing these thoughts, really, to those of us who have been blessed with happy marriages (though not by any means perfect, of course!).

Putting it another way, the Gates break-up made me very aware that a marriage doesn’t exist just for the couple themselves and their families, but for the wider community to which they belong.

The book I used to use when conducting a wedding has a paragraph which describes “the purpose of marriage” in fairly conventional terms, starting off, naturally enough, with the bride and groom. But it finishes with this sentence: “It was ordained for companionship, health and strength between husband and wife and for the welfare of society as a whole”.

“The welfare of society as a whole…” Really? I wonder how seriously we take that? Can our marriage really be a blessing to the people down the road that we hardly know? To the people at my work-place? To people with whom I share an interest through a club or society?

Answer: Yes! Yes, it can. For this world in which we live is unstable – politically, economically, socially - often quite frighteningly so. To borrow the words of the prophet Isaiah, the very foundations often seem to be shaking (Isaiah 24:18). And people who convey a sense of stability and calm bring reassurance to those around them. (So, of course, can unmarried people – I’m not forgetting that; but the married couple does so in a very special way.)

There are various ways this might happen. Couples (or singles) uncertain about their future, or troubled by problems, might feel moved to seek advice as well as example. The gift of hospitality, whether a full-on meal or just a coffee, can be massively helpful - my wife, as a stroppy teenager, remained in her local church largely because of couples who opened their homes to the young people; never mind that it was the biscuits and coffee rather than anything else (nothing “spiritual”! – oh no) that kept her going, the fact was that they were happy homes, and that meant a lot to her.

And, of course, the solid couple who have weathered a few storms and gained a few battle-scars (let’s be honest!) will have much to offer to those just starting out who are struggling with what seems like a major crisis. And as for the horrors – sorry, joys – of child-rearing…

You sometimes hear it said of a couple that “they just live for one another” or “they always do everything together”. Which sounds wonderful. But I’m not sure it is. Just as a church which is mainly inward-looking is unhealthy and likely to shrivel, so a marriage that is all about just “us” is heading for trouble. It needs a purpose beyond itself.

My wife and I aren’t particularly romantic, but after forty years of marriage we tend to hold hands if we’re out for a walk. A few years ago we were on holiday, strolling through a west country village. An old chap on an elderly bike went by. As he passed he shouted out to us with a cheery smile, “I wish I had somebody to hold hands with!”

And we realised afresh that in our marriage, which has certainly been far from perfect, we have something wonderfully precious. Precious for us, of course; but hopefully, too, precious for other people we may or may not know.

How each couple chooses to interpret the words from Ephesians – controversial words in today’s world – that I’ve put at the top, well, that’s for each couple to decide under God.

But whatever, it can only be healthy if we make up our minds afresh that, whatever our marriage is about, it isn’t just “us”!

Heavenly Father, whether I am single or married, widowed or divorced, please help me to live my life in such a way as to shine something of the light of Jesus to others, and so to make this hurting world a better place. Amen.

Thinking about mirrors

Now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. 1 Corinthians 13:12

Most of us use a mirror several times a day without so much as thinking about it; it’s just part of everyday life. But if we do think about it, we realise that it really is a very clever invention. You can hold up this piece of glass and see a near-perfect reflection of your own face (though, of course, you may prefer not to!). Amazing!

Well, I don’t know when such glass mirrors were invented, but I’m pretty sure that generations of human beings would have been amazed to see such a thing.

In New Testament times mirrors would have been made of polished brass or some other metal, which would leave you peering a little awkwardly to get even a half-good view of yourself. And it’s that kind of mirror Paul is talking about in this verse. He’s not talking about seeing ourselves physically, of course, but of how we “see” life in general, including God and matters of “religion” - and saying that our view is at best clouded and partial.

To be honest, I don’t think the NIV Bible, from which I have quoted, is quite right, because the words Paul uses - literally, “through a mirror, in a riddle” - convey the essential idea of something that’s obscure and unsatisfactory. The old King James Bible says we see “through a glass, darkly” (I still like that!); N T Wright talks about seeing “puzzling reflections in a mirror”: the Good News Bible has “a dim image in a mirror”; and The Message paraphrase goes the whole hog and chooses to alter the metaphor altogether: “We don’t yet see things clearly; we’re squinting in a fog, peering in a mist” (I like that too!).

Whatever, what Paul is saying is that our understanding of things – even biblical, Christian things – is a long, long, long way from being perfect.

But – not for ever! “Now”, he goes on to say, we see in this very unsatisfactory way; but “then” we shall see “face to face”. “Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known”. “Now”… and “then” - the difference between the two will be beyond description.

In a nutshell, Christian, you’re heading for perfection, but you aren’t there yet!

If this is so, it should stir up at least two feelings in our hearts – and, as it happens, they both begin with h.

First, hope.

Last time, under the heading Waiting for God, I wrote about the fact that God often keeps his people waiting. We thought about Martha and Mary of Bethany (John 11), following the death of their brother Lazarus. After sending for Jesus, he delayed two whole days before coming to them, which must have seemed an age. And every Christian knows the experience of praying – and praying – and praying – and…

Paul’s words here remind us that this applies too to the whole big picture of God’s dealings with the human race, and not least with us, his people. Here we are, living two thousand years after the earthly life of Jesus – and still he hasn’t come back!

But if Christianity is about anything, it’s about hope. The Bible repeatedly assures us that God is going to wind up the affairs of this troubled world and bring it to a perfect and glorious climax, when all sin and evil, pain and sorrow, will be finally banished. Just soak your mind in the last two chapters of Revelation, at the end of the Bible, and you can’t be in any doubt about that…

“God will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away” (Revelation 21: 4). Words I love to read at a funeral; but words that are perfect for every ordinary day as well.

May God help us to live as men and women of hope and optimism, rejoicing each day in the wonderful future to which we can look!

But now the second h… humility.

If our grasp of spiritual things really is as obscure as Paul suggests, we’d better be careful not to be too sure of ourselves. No arrogance, please.

Yes, we have God’s word in the Bible – but much of that is difficult to understand (as the Bible itself recognises: 2 Peter 3:16). And yes, we have the Holy Spirit living within us – but the sin that still clouds our souls also has the effect of clouding our vision. Yes, we perhaps have a good church, good preachers and teachers, good Christian books to read.

Yes. Good. But even if all this is true, the fact remains that our understanding is extremely limited, and we know only a millionth part of what there is to know.

So… humility is called for! We could be wrong, even on the things we’re most sure of. That wonderfully convincing author or preacher could be wrong.

Stick to the essentials – Christ crucified, risen, ascended, and one day coming back. For the rest, let’s temper strong convictions with humble teachability. And let’s look forward to the day when that cloudy mirror will be gone, and we shall see Jesus face to face!

Heavenly Father, please keep me hoping, even when the waiting seems long. And please keep me humble, even when I’m most sure I’m right. Amen.

Waiting for God

A man named Lazarus was ill… Now Jesus loved Martha and her sister and Lazarus. So when he heard that Lazarus was sick, he stayed where he was two more days… John 11:1-6

Hang on a minute! Isn’t there something wrong with that bit of scripture? Hasn’t somebody made a mess of the translation? Surely that word “So” should be “But” or “Yet”?

Yes, indeed! If “so” is right, we would expect John to finish the sentence  something like this: “Now Jesus loved Martha and her sister and Lazarus. So when he heard that Lazarus was sick, he immediately sent a message: ‘Tell them I’m on my way…!’ and started on the journey”.

But no: Jesus “stayed where he was two more days”! How very strange.

The translation is correct. True, some Bible versions do have “but” or “yet”, but the best experts are all agreed that they are mistaken: John wrote “So” because… he meant “So”. Which means that he leaves us to figure out for ourselves why Jesus should act in such a peculiar way. If he really loved Mary and Martha, why would he subject them to such a cruel wait?

We can only speculate. It can’t have been because of any doubt or uncertainty on his part about what would happen – he had, after all, raised people from death before, sometimes even from a distance.

Was he testing their faith? Hardly; they had already demonstrated their faith by calling for him in the first place, so what more might he expect?

He knew, of course, that his own death was now very close, so perhaps he wanted the miracle of Lazarus’ rising to be a preparation for the even greater thing that was to come: a message to people that “Yes, this man Jesus really does have power over death itself!”.

Certainly, the lengthy interval between Lazarus’ death and his re-emergence from the tomb (four days, according to verse 17) would thwart any danger of people suggesting that he was never really dead at all. No: what happened with Lazarus was no hoax or trick but sheer, unadulterated miracle. But Martha and Mary were asked to pay a heavy price in terms of grief and wretchedness – “Why, oh why, doesn’t he come!”

Perhaps there isn’t a lot more we can say.

But there is a truth here which Christians have proved again and again down the centuries: God does often seem to keep his people waiting. And if that is so, it isn’t out of indifference or cruelty, but for some good reason.

The more we stop and think about it, the more we realise that waiting is in fact a very important part of Christian faith: as one writer puts it, Christians are by nature “people-in-waiting”. Paul often stresses this: to give just one example, in 1 Corinthians 1:7 he says that we “eagerly await for our Lord Jesus Christ to be revealed”. It’s part of the essence of Christianity.

I said that I didn’t think Jesus was simply testing the faith of Martha and Mary. But sometimes, for us, testing may be one of the reasons why waiting is called for: do we have sufficient faith to trust in Jesus through gritted teeth, or are we just “fair weather Christians”? And, of course, in a period of waiting we often learn important lessons that otherwise we might miss. Just ask any mature Christian of many years’ standing! Perhaps just look back over your own experience!

The trouble with waiting, of course, is simple: it can be so hard, so agonisingly hard. Mary isn’t afraid to reproach Jesus for his delay: “Lord… if you had been here my brother would not have died” (verse 21). And at other times – waiting for news of a loved one, waiting for the birth of a baby, waiting for the result of a job interview, even just sitting in a traffic jam or waiting for a delivery to come – we can feel driven to distraction.

But whether we think of such personal circumstances or the big picture Paul is talking about, the Lazarus story assures us that the wait is for a reason, and one day we will see it as worthwhile.

I’ve quoted Paul. But he isn’t alone in the New Testament to have this very forward-looking, future-oriented attitude. Here is John (I John 3:2) “Dear friends, now we are children of God, and what we will be has not yet been made known. But we know that when Christ appears we shall be like him, for we shall see him as he is”.

And here is a beautiful line from a hymn by William Cowper (1731-1800): “The bud may have a bitter taste,/ But sweet will be the flower”.

Or, as an American president once assured the world: now that he was in charge, “you ain’t seen nothin’ yet”.

A sentiment there that I think Martha and Mary would have identified with… So, Christian, hang on in there – truly, you ain’t seen nothin’ yet!

Father God, I confess that there are times I am simply unable to understand the mystery of your timing, and especially why you seem to keep us waiting. But help me to keep trusting and believing, and so bring me to that place, like Martha and Mary, of breath-taking amazement and joy. Amen.