Wednesday 8 January 2020

Thinking about intentions

I will sing of your love and justice; to you, Lord, I will sing praise. I will be careful to lead a blameless life - when will you come to me? I will conduct the affairs of my house with a blameless heart. I will not look with approval on anything that is vile. I hate what faithless people do; I will have no part in it. The perverse of heart shall be far from me; I will have nothing to do with what is evil. Psalm 101:1-4

There’s a saying (not in the Bible, by the way): “The road to hell is paved with good intentions.” I’m not sure if that is sound theology! - but the point it’s making is clear enough: having good intentions is fine, but it’s no use if you don’t carry them out.

I’m sure all of us know the regret of intentions we have failed to fulfil. They come in many shapes and sizes...

On a fairly trivial level, we might start the day with a “to do list”, things we feel are important to us and which we look forward to ticking off one by one as the day goes on. But by the evening we find ourselves looking rather sadly at our list, aware that several items are still outstanding. Perhaps circumstances conspired against us; or we allowed ourselves to get side-tracked; or we genuinely tried but failed; or we just got weary and fed up. Whatever, we feel disappointed with ourselves and rather guilty.

Or it could be a big turning-point in our lives - we lapsed from our marriage or baptismal vows, we failed in our commitment to a new job or venture, we gave up on a new ambition. And now, perhaps many years later, we look back with mixed feelings and a sorry shake of the head.

Not to mention, of course, such matters as a determination to be patient, honest and kind, to not worry, to go the extra mile, to be on time: plus a million other things...

During my student years (1970 to be precise) I bought a new Bible. I wrote my name and the date in the flyleaf and then added four lines of poetry: “For my heart’s desire/ Unto Thine is bent:/ I aspire/ To a full consent.”

Those few words of George Herbert, in essence a simple but profound prayer, summed up perfectly the genuine intention of my heart at that time: an idealistic intention to be a whole-hearted follower of Jesus. Today, thank God, I remain a follower of Jesus: but... “a full consent”? a “heart’s desire” as strong now as it was then...?  Mmm, not so sure about that!

Which is worse - to have good intentions which you fail to keep perfectly? or not to have good intentions at all?

I think that question is what’s known as a “no-brainer”. Of course we should have good intentions! Not to do so is like giving up before we’ve even started. But, to put it mildly, realism is called for.

Psalm 101 is a real challenge when it comes to intentions. It’s just eight verses, yet the words “I will” or “I will not” occur no less than fifteen times: on average twice per verse. This is a man declaring his intentions, no doubt about that!

Here is just a selection of them: “I will be careful to lead a blameless life” (verse 2); “I will not look with approval on anything that is vile” (verse 3); “I will have nothing to do with what is evil” (verse 4).

The heading of this psalm associates it with David, and while these headings were not part of the original text, there seems no reason to doubt it in this case. Certainly it fits a man who is keen not only to live rightly but also to rule justly and fairly, to be truly kingly. Hence: “Whoever slanders their neighbour in secret I will put to silence” (verse 5); “Every morning I will put to silence all the wicked in the land” (verse 8).

Well, whether these are the words of a great king or just an ordinary person, they are bracing stuff. So the challenge is: How strong and clear am I with my “I will”s and “I will not”s? However sadly I sometimes fail, do I at least have that firm intention every day to do, say and think only what is good? Putting the same question in New Testament terms, am I determined to live a life of purity and holiness? A Christlike life?

Assuming David did write these words, I suppose you could say they also offer a kind of comfort to us, albeit of a rather ironic kind.

The fact is, putting it bluntly, that the man who wrote these words was a miserable failure! You only have to read the books of Samuel to see how, with all his undoubted greatness, there were many occasions when he glaringly failed to live up to his own intentions - both in national, “political” matters, and also in matters of personal morality.

Perhaps this is wrong of me, but I must admit that I find that sort-of comforting when I fail to live up to my intentions: “Oh well, at least I’m obviously in good company!”

But then, of course, I have to remind myself that while, yes, “none of us is perfect”, there is in fact only one person we should compare ourselves with...

Forget David! Look to “great David’s greater son”!

Dear Master, in whose life I see/ All that I long but fail to be,/ Let Thy clear light for ever shine,/ To shame and guide this life of mine./ Though what I dream and what I do/ In my poor days are always two,/ Help me, oppressed by things undone,/ O Thou whose deeds and dreams were one. Amen.

John Hunter, 1848-1917

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